National Lampoon's Attack of the 5 Ft. Women is a Showtime television film that parodies two sensational news stories from the s: the Tonya Harding - Nancy Kerrigan incident, and the John and Lorena Bobbitt incident. The film is presented as a double feature , with Julie Brown starring in both segments. The title is a takeoff of Attack of the 50 Foot Woman. Figure skater Tonya Hardly Brown , desperate to win the gold medal in the Olympics, tries to eliminate competitor Nancy Cardigan Khrystyne Haje by hiring someone to injure her; although she only suffers a small bruise. The news story is so tragic and heart-rending that all of Tonya's co-conspirators turn themselves in and finger her. Sailing above the scandal, she goes on to compete at the Winter Olympics , but is undone by her lack of talent and undersized panties. Lenora Babbitt Brown , having been recently pardoned for her crimes, tells Dick Langley Sam McMurray about the events that had led up to her arrest: She had cut off the penis of her drunken husband, Juan Wayne Babbitt Adam Storke , because he could not satisfy her sexually. After it was devoured by a dog, Dr.


Eric Dane, Rebecca Gayheart and Kari Ann Peniche
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Competitive ice skater Tonya Harding rises amongst the ranks at the U. Figure Skating Championships, but her future in the activity is thrown into doubt when her ex-husband intervenes. Tonya Harding : There's no such thing as truth. It's bullshit. Everyone has their own truth, and life just does whatever the fuck it wants. Sign In. Play trailer Biography Comedy Drama. Director Craig Gillespie.
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